What do the Swamp Donkeys, Homeslices, and Squatches have in common?
They never made it to the big leagues—but they should have.
At Outfield Outlaws, we’ve created a rogue’s gallery of fictional baseball teams that feel like they’ve been ripped straight out of a cracked baseball card pack from the 1980s. They’re wild, weird, and proudly ridiculous—and they each come with their own one-of-a-kind mascot tee.
Here are a few of our all-stars:
1. Anchorage Swamp Donkeys
A moose with attitude, born to break bats and hearts. He’s big, burly, and rocks flannel under his jersey. The cold never bothered this beast—he's been stealing bases and spotlight since ‘77 (or so we say).
Shop the Swamp Donkeys Tee → [LINK]
2. Pensacola Pickles
Quick on his briney feet and always caught in a rundown, this pickle plays dirty—literally. Whether he's sliding into second or dodging relish jokes, he's always in a crunch.
Grab the Pickle Tee → [LINK]
3. Bakersfield Bananas
Peeling off fastballs like it’s batting practice. This potassium-packed mascot is all swagger and slap hits. The best part? He slides into home in his peel.
See the Banana Shirt → [LINK]
4. Seattle Squatches
You’ll never see him coming, but you’ll definitely hear the rumors. This lumbering slugger may be cryptid by classification, but his swing is 100% verified.
Catch the Squatch Gear → [LINK]
5. Hackensack Homeslices
Serving pizza and heat, this saucy slugger brings the flavor to every game. The only thing cheesier than his uniform? His on-deck dance moves.
Get the Slice Tee → [LINK]
Why Fake Teams Matter
These aren’t just jokes—they’re collectibles. Every shirt in the Outfield Outlaws lineup is designed with vintage flair, gritty detail, and enough personality to fill a stadium. Our shirts aren’t just gear—they’re conversation starters, ice breakers, and instant fan favorites.
Want first dibs on future fake franchises?
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