💪Strengths: Switch-Hits Like a Mirror Monster, Untrackable Power, Reads Pitch Sequences Like Tree Rings
⚙️ Weaknesses: Distracted by Campfire Smells, Won’t Swing at Curveballs on Tuesdays, Refuses to Slide—“Feet too valuable”
Boone’s origins are soaked in fog and rumor. Legends claim he once used a tree trunk as a bat and hit a pitch so hard it knocked out stadium lights across the forest. Before the Squatches found him, Boone lived off the land — or maybe the land lived off Boone.
He was first seen behind the outfield wall during a fog delay, calmly eating sunflower seeds and watching the sky. The next day, he was in the lineup.
Shop Boone's Gear
🎽 Shop Boone Dinger Gear → link to his shirt(s)
🃏 Unlock His Trading Card → coming soon
💾 Add Boone to Your Lineup → “Build Your Outlaw Team” coming soon
📬 Find Out More About Boone → Check Out Rookies Blog
📸 Got Boone in your lineup? Tag @OutfieldOutlaws and show off your Seattle Squatches swag.
Boone Dinger Fun Facts
Absurd Facts:
Absurd Facts:
Hit a walk-off homer and disappeared before reaching first. The ball landed. Boone didn’t.
Has never worn shoes. Claims they "ruin ground connection."
Once hit a pitch so high it was ruled weather interference.
Quotes:
Quotes:
“I don’t watch tape. I read tree bark.”
“Every strikeout is just a sacrifice to the forest.”
“Pitchers aim for the plate. I aim for the myth.”
Rivalries:
Rivalries:
Boone once mocked Donk’s “slow-mo warmup” in a post-game interview. Donk hasn’t stopped chopping bats since.
Boone stared down Mick mid-game. Mick blinked. Boone was gone. Mick hasn’t stopped swinging since.
Rookies Notes:
Rookies Notes:
“Last time I followed him into the dugout, I ended up in a moss cave with a wood-carved bat and no cell service.”
“Once heard him hum a walk-up song backwards. The scoreboard rebooted.”
“Last time I followed him into the dugout, I ended up in a moss cave with a wood-carved bat and no cell service.”